Part 1: Meeting your soulmate
While you could confine your search to the already existing OUMMCBNOM
readership, it is certain that there are thousands of people out there who subscribe to the
values of the OUMMCBNOM even though they have never had the opportunity to set
eyes upon the document itself. So, one fine way to meet new people is to introduce them
to the OUMMCBNOM and see where it leads. For instance, try these dialogs:
You: Have you ever read the OUMMCBNOM?
Lover-to-be: Why no, I haven't.
You: Well then, why don't you come up to my room and I'll show you my whole
collection.
You: Have you ever worn a Ribbon O' The Month?
L-t-b: Why no, I haven't.
You: Well then, why don't you slip out of those clothes and try one on?
Or, for the special girl or guy who is already knowledgeable in the ways of OUMMCBNOM
You: Hey baby, wanna come by some time and ask my Republican?
L-t-b:
You: You'd better take me to Big Al's, because baby, you're driving me crazy.
You: Hey sweet thing, how about you be Prudence and I'll be Camilla?
You: Honey, I'd write a letter to your editor any time.
We hope that these ideas help you in your journey toward love. Just remember that every relationship needs constant attention to stay fresh and happy, so don't forget to keep the OUMMCBNOM a part of your life together: read it together, write letters to the editor together, invite the editors to your wedding, and feed them well. Good luck!